Marriage
This word send shivers down the spine of some people. To me, it means the start of something very exciting. I do look forward to it. I have been faced with the talk abt this the whole wk. People at work getting married and pregnant.
I do seriously think tt nursing have made me grow up alot faster than i would have love to. I was relating this to james the other day. I remember my poly lecturer telling the whole class that you will leave nursing a different person n that you will be alot mature than the pple of your age. I thought she was joking! :) But now 4 years down the road, i finally undrestand what she meant. People at my age think and worry abt projects, exams and starting relationships. While here i am, working with adults who are married and want to have children, watching children come and go walking the thin line between life and death.
I dare not say tt i am very mature in my behaviour, coz...i still do act ctue. But when it come to issues abt health, i suddenly put on another hat. I talk differently, realte differently empathise differently. Well, tt's bcoz i am a nurse. I can't help it tt i grow up faster than other pple. I find myself wanting to cross tt line and join the rest of the adult world who are married and have someone to share everything with. To start having children. I seem to feel tt i am aging and want to make full use of my youth to have healthy children, and not wait till i am 30.
Even in the frenzie of all these, there is a still small voice within me tt keeps reassuring me tt it is not yet time. It keeps questioning why am i so eager. so excuses abt "oh, bcoz pple at work are also doing so", "bcoz i am sure teck is the one", "bcoz i adore children" come up and blur my vision. I believe that there is a time for everything, bcoz tt's what God tells us in the bible. No amt of eagerness from my serlf or pressure tt the world puts on me can stop God good pleasing and perfect will. His timing should be our utmost consideration. If it is not yet time, then there will be waiting. If God can allowed abraham to wait till he is old to let sarah bear him a son, then what is 1-2years of waiting going to cost me? Nothing!
As they all say, Patience is a vertue. So now i'll have to do is wait....wait....wait for God's timing. :)
consuming fire fan into flames